In everyday life, resisting change is what leads to most of our insecurities, worries and anxieties. When we realise that uncertainty is undeniable and learn to adapt with change, we become peaceful and happy. 

However accepting change is easier said than done! The fear of not knowing what will happen next in our relationships, careers, financial situation or living arrangements causes a lot of worry. So how do we learn to embrace change instead of being afraid of it?


1. Take the adventure

Have you ever travelled? Isn't that giving up what you know and what you are comfortable with, to experience a little of the unknown? But we don't call that uncertainty, we call it adventure. Things often have a 50/50 chance of going our way or the other, trust that you will be able to handle the disappointment, change, and discomfort and treat it all as an adventure. It takes as much blind belief to have faith or to have fear, so why not choose faith?

2. Remember your coping skills

Take a few minutes to list three major changes that have happened in your life and then try to recall how you felt during the time leading up to the event and how you coped despite your worries. These could include the last time you healed from a break-up, resettled in a new home or city, adjusted to a new position or job, embraced a new member into your family, healed from an injury or illness or even simply upgraded a device.

The initial stages after change require us to learn and grow, we don't have a choice so we adapt, kicking, screaming or willingly and we do get by. By reconnecting with times in your past where you have actually thrived after what may have been an unwanted change at the time, you will reinforce that you are a survivor and that change is always for good reasons.

It sad how many sensible people destroy their present with obsessive fears of the future, instead of enjoying and relishing what they have. Be it money or a wonderful relationship, great health or promising career, instead of being grateful, breathing it all in and basking with joy within, we ruin it for ourselves and others through constant insecure behaviour from the fear that we may lose what we have. The fear of being caught off guard when that terrible dreaded change comes keeps us playing the dress rehearsals of doom and gloom.

Whatever storm hits, remember that you are resilient and calm will soon follow. So relax, exhale and smile instead.

3. Practise being present

People are usually caught by surprise because they were not mindful enough to read the writing on the walls. When we are connected and mindful to what is really going on around and within us, we are in the flow of events and change is part of that stream. More often than not, change does not just spring up on us; it is a gradual process that we were oblivious to. When we try to stay grounded, practice centering ourselves and have a way to connect, we are more in tune and in sync with others. We are then more intuitive and can pick up the rhythm around us.

Expecting or holding on to things to always stay the same way is impractical because anything that does not grow stagnates and then dies.

Sure tomorrow may bring challenges that are not easy to face, but in overcoming them you may learn some valuable lessons. The only certainty is change, and when it comes, trust that you will move gracefully into a life of more fulfillment than you could have imagined.

For more details on accepting change and moving on, pick up Malti Bhojwani's book, The Mind Spa - Ignite Your Inner Life Coach, published by Om Books International.

Malti Bhojwani is a professional life coach, author and facilitator of transformation and self discovery.Having been on her own in the personal development industry for over 15 years, she brings her years of experience to scores of individuals, teams in corporations and entrepreneurs all over the world. She is an affiliate with Aberkyn - a Change Leadership Partner, co-founded by McKinsey & Company who have recently set up their SEA office. You can visit her site at

Views expressed and claims made in the articles on this site are the contributors' own, and nrizone does not necessarily agree with them, or endorse them, in any way.
Contributions are published in good faith, with due diligence, and liabilities for authenticity or copyright lie with the authors.

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